Cupid’s Corner: Dear CeeCee, my wife farts in front of me and it disgusts me

Dear CeeCee, 

Is it normal in marriage to let standards go such as farting, picking nose in front of each other, burping, etc? Or should one continue to maintain standards as if not married? My wife farts in front of me and it disgusts me.

Dear friend, 

Happiness comes from within. That’s why it feels so good to fart… LOL.

I’ll be serious now. 

When it comes to breaking wind, burping or flicking a booger in front of a romantic partner, there are people who think it’s no big deal. Some may even look at it as a positive thing; it just means two people are in love and totally at ease around each other. 

Then, there are people (like yourself) who find it repulsive, humiliating, and perhaps consider it proof that romance is officially dead.

The truth is, while passing gas or burping in front of each other can be a sign of acceptance and maturity in a relationship, in some situations, it can also be a selfish or insensitive move. 

Assuming your partner is always farting, burping or picking her nose and ‌it’s making you uncomfortable, or even sick to your stomach, if your partner does not ‌respect your wishes, it could be a terrible indicator.

That begs the question, have you told her how you feel about it or are you choosing to remain silently disgusted by her? 

If she’s not aware of how this makes you feel, she could think it’s a sign of a mature and strong relationship. There isn’t much you can’t do in front of your spouse if you’re comfortable enough to toot in front of them. You want someone in your life with whom you can quarrel, cry, pettily complain about your employer, and ‌be your lame self. And all of that intimacy pales in contrast to the comfort of farting or burping in front of your spouse.

If your partner’s habits aren’t caused by a medical problem and are making you uncomfortable, you should definitely tell her. Just be sure to approach the matter in a nonjudgmental manner to lessen your partner’s emotions of humiliation. Remember, she could just be trying to show how secure she feels with you. 

You can request that she relieve herself in another room and spray an air freshener if she doesn’t have the luxury of leaving. That appears to be a reasonable request. If she agrees, that’s fantastic. 

In your case, try to adopt a lighter approach to life. Women do not walk around smelling like roses. We have gas; we scratch and have things stuck up our noses as well. Farting and burping are normal aspects of human life. 

In fact, the act of sexual intercourse is undoubtedly far grosser than either of them.

Feeling disgusted because of something your body does as well may be a little extreme. This makes me believe that there may be a larger problem at play. Take your time to ask yourself if you’re disgusted just because of the farts and burps or if you’re using those as excuses to mask how you feel about her in general. 

While you figure out your emotional issues, remember that you promised to take this woman in sickness and in health, in fresh air and in smelly farts. Don’t make your wife feel ashamed of feeling comfortable with you. 

With love,

CeeCee💌

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