There was once a little boy who didn’t do as he was told. He told lies, went places he wasn’t supposed to go, and did things that he was specifically told not to do.
I bet it does! All children test the rules and the boundaries they are given.
Obedience is a humble virtue. The innate attitude of a person is to initially complain about the things he needs to accomplish because he might have found it unfair or difficult. Getting your children do what you are asking them to is indeed difficult especially if you don’t know how to reprimand them right to get things done. How to let a child obey is a test for the parent’s ability to instruct and let things be understood.
Here Are Some Tips You Can Rely On To Encourage Child Obedience In Your Family
- Always give reasons why
Explain why something needs to be done. Don’t just command your child to do things without an explanation. Sometimes, the child may not understand why, and so he will not do it.
- Learn to say “NO”
Children tend to ask for extension or reduction of a job for relief or for a test of your firmness. As parents, you can instill authority by standing firm on what you have said. Deadlines are ceasing points which children need to value to avoid procrastination.
- Use the reward-consequence system
It is but essential for children to know that if something is not done, an unfavorable result would happen and vice versa. The tendency for parents is to do the things by themselves instead which is not just an infraction to their own rules but also a clear revelation of inconsistency. You can always take away privileges for instances of defiance by the child.
- Don’t always rush to clean up after your child
Let him learn personal responsibility. Ask the child to clean his own mess. This is not just discipline but also a means to let him know there is actually a consequence.
- Add extra chores for the things undone
For example, you can let the child fill up a paper of his written promise to finish what is asked of him.
- Avoid threatening, shouting and intimidating
Instead, talk about how you feel discouraged and sad about his defiance. Let him understand by citing situations like what does he think would happen to the family if you also stop working and earning money for them?
- Give punishments that relate to the disobedience
Never give consequences that are not related to the misdeed and implement them at the right time. Correcting the child right then and there is more effective than accumulating the consequences.
Examples Of Stories And Games You Could Use To Teach Your Child Obedience
Children will learn from the Pinocchio story that your conscience tells you right from wrong. Even though many children know they should follow the rules, they don’t know what their conscience is. The Pinocchio story helps them understand what a conscience is. The story also teaches that there are consequences happen when you make the wrong choice or disobey.
- Little Red Riding Hood
One of the instructions from Little Red Riding Hood’s mother when she left home was to be careful walking through the forest and not to move away from the main road. This, of course, is forgotten and the innocent child falls right into the wolf’s trap and takes the shortcut he suggested.
- Martial Arts and Sports
Older children are most likely to pick up an interest in a sport. Having to endure discipline from training and instructions from their coach does well for their ability to receive and obey instruction.
Child Obedience should always come from the parents by setting a good example. Show your children how you can manage to accomplish whatever you have started and how you are responsible enough to face the consequences of your actions.
Teaching kids to listen and do as they are told is not as important as having a strong relationship with a child. When children love and trust the adults in their lives, they are more likely to follow their lead. That doesn’t mean they won’t test the boundaries though. Experiences help them learn.
We also don’t want our kids to lose their sense of direction and simply do whatever they are asked by anyone in any situation. Helping our children to follow their inner compass and learn to obey the dictates of their hearts is a life-long gift as well.
This article was first published on AfricaParent.com
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