Hello Praise,

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Please permit my use of words here because my marriage is on the verge of breaking up and I am so annoyed with myself for falling into the hands of this wicked woman that calls herself my wife. I have successfully built a business and all I crave for is her attention but this woman of mine is so scattered and wicked. She doesn’t show any form of affection that I want in a wife and she is so selfish that all she cares about are her numerous projects. Even though she supports me because her business is also doing well but I feel that is why she is taking me for granted.

Please what do you have to say about this before I throw this woman out of my life.

Japhet E.

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Dear Japhet,

Thanks so much for your mail and the concerns you have raised is top on the list of the challenges a lot of men who have written in these last 4 weeks seem to have in their marriages so I’d be devoting a lot of time to handle personality differences because everything you have described is nothing but your inability to recognize and place the true personality of your wife.

I have seen too many men run an organization who found it difficult to run their homes. How many celebrity marriages have we seen break down within the first one year? How many men have moved from one woman to another thinking they would find happiness? I laugh when I see a man who isn’t willing to take responsibility for a woman that has been battered by another man. As a matter of fact a lot of men who married out of her beauty soon found out that it was a body they married not the real person. The depth of a woman is beyond comprehension and it takes a wise man to unearth her that is why you don’t need to marry if you are not willing to become her student to pick the signal of how best to maximize this complex but interesting creature.. Are you aware wives come in 4 different brand of cars and you can’t afford to drive them based on assumption but the way they were configured to be driven?

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The first class of package is the Intimidating wife – She is a natural leader and executive who loves to move from one project to another and has lofty dreams that she can’t stand any one standing in her way. Do you know the best way to handle her is to serve her and be matured enough to earn her respect. Once she sees a father and a mentor in you she will learn to live by your counsel and understanding her also helps you overlook her tendency to want to take the lead. If you listen to your friends they will tell you that she is the husband but if you listen to her creator He will tell you that she is a global arrow in your quaver that you can either shoot to the entire world and become a proud coach of a successful player or you pocket her and become a husband to a nagging wife. You shouldn’t have a problem with her popularity because she goes everywhere in your name and that is a mark of greatness.

Creative Convertible wife- She is also highly misunderstood and takes a secured man to handle. How do you handle a flashy live-wire of every show who breaks every rule consistently not because she is wicked but because she is a non-conformist. Can you stand a woman who has got a lot of male friends and well loved by all of them? Can you stand your wife becoming more popular than you and well praised by all because of her friendly disposition. Yes! A creative woman could be a bit scattered and has got too many affiliations but that is a woman whose network can come in handy for the family. To many of your friends she is a wayward woman and they may counsel you to tame her but to her maker she is your publicity secretary, image maker and a key that can open any door for you and the family. There is no point becoming jealous over her popularity or trying to tame her as a result of your insecurity. As a matter of fact you don’t have to feel threatened by her mighty friend. You need to create an environment that makes her potential thrive because the moment you try to stifle her she will begin to look for someone else to talk to because she can’t do without talking. And don’t consider her rude when she talks because she wants a friend and a play mate in her spouse and not a task master or a sensory judger. Treating her right gives you a global icon but taming her gives you a pretending  dummy who has become introverted to please you and whose global juice her world and you may never enjoy. She is a bird that needs to fly and if you can provide wings for her flight she will always make you proud and sing your praises to the heaven

How a man who is married to a creative convertible expects her to permanently switch to a quiet time mode is beyond me. Unfortunately so many women have had their strongest points messed up by men who couldn’t stand their originality. How having several male friends translates to sleeping with them in your imagination is beyond me. I have seen too many men trying to turn an original woman into the copy they have in their imagination and that doesn’t usually turn out well. What would you gain by getting your woman to be afraid of you? If you thrive in being feared then you must know that your home is a military barracks where people obey you not out of respect but cos you have the power of the bullet. I am aware that a typical creative convertible could go out of control but with the right sense of direction you can be sure she would hit the target.

Everyone talks about the Proverbs 31 woman but what many don’t talk about is the greatness of her man who gave her wings to fly. Don’t allow the society, culture, tradition, family and your ego mess up your babe’s creativity. I marvel when I see men who expects their women to be quiet when they are at a function together as a matter of fact some can’t stand their wife’s jokes or plays outside simply because the society considers her actions disrespectful excuse me if you can play with her in your bedroom why pretend outwardly simply because you want to please a crowd.

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The creative convertible must be handled with care such that you don’t stifle her strength. She loves good touch and words of affirmation and that is why you can’t malign her with your words. Always remember that she is a flower that blossoms and glows when loved and appreciated but could also die in an environment of pretense and hostility. Enlarge your heart and change your perception as a matter of fact support her.

Trying to generalize the tendencies of every woman without humbling yourself to read their user’s manual is a recipe to marital failure.

To be continued…

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