There is no gain without pain.


No pain we suffer,

No trial we experience is wasted.

They are all for a purpose.


Yes, they are to make us shine.

They are to make us better.



Dust yourself down,

Rise and shine again.

Dare to shine, despite all odds.

Shine like the pearl that you are.


Polished stones undergo thorough waxing,

To become a sought-after shining gem

Shine like the pearl that you are.



If everything is going downhill,

Don’t go down with them.

Rise above them and shine.

Shine like the pearl that you are.



If things are not going as planned;

Review the plan, change the plan,
You may even change the goal,

but never forget your purpose

once you define what that purpose is. 

Shine like the pearl that you are.


Every trial and tribulation teaches a lesson.

And every lesson changes a person.

Let your trials change you for the better.

Rise again and shine. Keep shining.

Shine like the pearl that you are.”

Dear pearls,

Sometimes in our lives, we encounter an occurrence that tends to shake our whole lives to the very foundation. An event that shakes the core of our being.

Well, I will say ‘shift’ happens. I mean, change happens. It is our disposition and attitude towards this change that matters most at the end of the day.

Our attitude towards this incoming change can either make or mar us. So my friend, my pearl, do not despair. Do not let the change happen to you unprepared.

You should rather ‘happen’ to the change. Make the change happen. Take charge and purposefully make the change that will be happening a positive one and to your advantage.

Channel your energy into creating how the outcome of the trial and tribulation would be. And please, do not forget to put God in the equation. He works wonders.

You may use this formula:

New and better you = (Your current situation) – (Negatives) + (Positives) + God.

Where as; your current situation = You, your troubles, negative thoughts, etc.

Negatives =  bad thoughts, wrong attitude, fears, worries, hopelessness, depression, suicide etc

Positives = Good thoughts, gratitude, happiness, kindness to self, self-love positive affirmations, etc.

God = O yes! The Almighty God – The one and only.

You have to practice this daily to get the desired result. Put the usage of the formula on repeat for a better outcome. It is not easy, but I can assure you it works.

Even if troubles hit you from left, right, and centre, you can rise above them. A saying by Charli Chaplin states that “nothing is permanent in this world – not even our troubles”. So pearls, I want you to know that your troubles are not permanent. It can only get better.

Another good quote that I love so much is from Bill Wither’s song ‘Lean on me’.

‘Sometimes in our lives, we all have pains

We all have sorrow

But if we are wise

We know that there’s always tomorrow.’

What distresses you? Let us talk about it.

Be assured of confidentiality.

Yours sincerely,

Aunty ‘Lola

I remain committed to your wellness and self-development.


‘Lola Funmilayo Jimoh (aka Aunty ‘Lola) is the manager, admin & accounts at TheCable. She is a youth coach, self-development and trauma counsellor at ESFNETWORK, a social enterprise that aims to engage, enlighten and empower youths, create mental health awareness and aid ideas to flourish.

She is the author of Edifying SoulFood and founder of BMHH, a mental health foundation.

You may write to her through [email protected] and can also connect with her on Facebook and Twitter @auntylola or Instagram @auntylolaFJ.

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