Forging ahead after a nasty breakup can be emotionally draining, even when it’s in the best interest of both partners. Tendencies to indulge in self destructive habits are usually extremely high at this sensitive point.


Although the way people react after breakups may vary from one person to another, often times, emotions override logical reasoning leading to some all-too common post breakups traps.

Breakups, as painful as it may be, do not signal the end of your love life. Without further ado, here are five mistakes you shouldn’t fall prey to while healing form a nasty breakup.

Wallowing in self pity


There is no harm in reliving the good and bad moments with your ex just to learn from your past mistakes and upgrade your expectations for a future relationship. But its gets harmful when you continue to wallow in self pity and assume the role of a victim in your mind.

Once the mourning period is over, get a clear head and focus on things that make you happy. Remember to give priority to both your physical and mental health.

Stalking your ex on social media


Another pitfall you should avoid during your healing process is social media stalking. Despite the constant temptation to know whether your ex is doing well without you, it is important you simply mind your business on social media, and don’t assume your ex has no right to move on with his/her life without you.

Don’t waste your time, emotions and even your data wondering what their lives might be like now. Instead, spend more time with people who bring out the best in you.

Don’t immediately try to remain close friends

Staying friends with a former lover should be after you’re entirely cleared with your feelings. Don’t just rush into the friendship zone until you’re sure both of you can handle the new kind of commitment. Also, your decision to remain friends should not be a means to cowardly hold on to the past rather than moving on.


Living in the shadow of your ex standards

Drastic physical changes to meet up the standards of your ex may leave you hanging in the past. Going as far as cutting off your hair, bleaching your skin or getting new tattoos will not undo what has been done, so embrace the present and live out your dreams as much as you can.

Seeking out revenge

Negative emotions can get intense after breakups, and revenge may seem like the right thing to do. Thoughts to inflict pain, damage properties or publicly humiliate, if acted on, will not only affect your ex lover but also put a strain on your emotional and physical well being.


No matter how traumatic a breakup could be, revenge is not a wise option. With time, those painful emotions, leaving you a better person.

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