Denrele Edun, Nigerian media personality, says his mother once caught him having sex with a girl at age 18.
The 39-year-old recalled the experience on Thursday via Instagram ahead of his 40th birthday set for June 13.
“I was 18. When it comes to my list of worst sex nightmares, my mum was walking in on me probably tops the list! I was dating one of the hottest girls in my hood (Ebute Metta) then, but my Mum was unimpressed!” he narrated.
“She couldn’t stand the sight of the girl, I didn’t give a f**k! I was 18 and damn well was gonna enjoy adolescence. One fateful Tuesday after so much strategic planning, I arranged for this chic to meet me up at the house.
“6:30 pm sharp! My dad and younger sisters would have gone to choir practice, My grandma and evil cousins were at Bible study and my Mum would have gone to her MFM prayer warrior service.
“Baby girl & I were going to do the ‘deed’ after weeks of endless ‘Petting’, ‘making out’ & ‘groping genitalia’! Long story cut short, we were going at ‘it’ in the dimly lit living room when my mum walked in on us.
“’As we jumped off each other. Me scrambling to wear my pants & my babe covering her full breasts to my mum’s glaring disapproval & disgust. So this is what you’ve been coming to do in this house”, my mum said calmly at her.”
On how he reacted, Denrele said he retorted his mum’s query by asking her why she wasn’t in church as planned.
“I stood tall & faced her. I was 18. I could talk back. She came to greet me. ‘Why aren’t you in church?’, I retorted. My Mum muttered something in her Indian dialect & left. I knew trouble was brewing but HIAN!” he continued.
“Baby girl, on the other hand, was shaking so bad. Saw her off to the junction & she went home. Fast forward to a few months after; I had planned a massive party in d area with another friend of mine (Late Abass, RIP).”
According to him, a similar incident would repeat itself at his party, prompting his mum to publicly embarrass him.
“It was my 1st year in UNILAG. Turnout was mad! Peeps photocopied the IVs. We were feeling fly! Halfway into the rave, mum walked in. I sensed something was amiss but was caught rocking babes on the dance floor,” he added.
“My Mum took the Microphone from the DJ & faced d crowd. Omo, She finished me that night! She spoke about my bedwetting back in the day, my lazy antics. In short, she opened my yansh, de-rep me finish.
“I was so embarrassed. Her parting shot, ‘you have 5 mins to finish whatever nonsense you’re doing here and come wash the dirty dishes u left at d backyard!’. Im laughing now but Mehn, it wasn’t funny then!”
Copyright 2022 TheCable. All rights reserved. This material, and other digital content on this website, may not be reproduced, published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed in whole or in part without prior express written permission from TheCable.
Follow us on twitter @Thecablestyle